Bonafiiedx

The Truth behind the Lies by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

The Truth behind the Lies

She changes her face to hide the disgrace she bares she carries the weight of a predetermined fate with no idea on how to change it. She hides the truth because she believes it will only hurt the relationship. But what if someone else slips? Would it be better she heard it from you or the other person. You dont want to hurt them with a lie But you dont want to destroy everything with the truth. But Whats a relationship based on honesty, trust, and love with no honesty. The feelings arent going to fade but you dont want to change the bond thats there. But if they really care, then it wont matter How Do You Pour Your Hea

Will you care... Please? by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

Will you care... Please?

put effort into me i know that its there, Just act like you wanna, pretend like you care. IT hurts to know you care so little while i care so much. Small things are all i want from you like your love, your kiss, your touch. I wish i could make you make you care a little bit more But im scared to tell you how i feel but at the same time scared to be ignored. Do you truely want to be with me? The question is in the air I wish i could really ask you Because honestly, All i really want to know Is if you Sincerely Care

Untitled by Bonafiiedx, literature

Surreal by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

Surreal

It felt so good saying "yes" to you after saying "no" so many times to myself. i asked help on what i should do with the situation and people said give up. i said no. So many times i wanted to quit but i couldnt and i waited for you even thought i knew i shouldn't. the wait paid off and i got my chance to say "Yes". Now that i have you I'm afraid to lose you. Its the worst fear i have, far above death or pain. Because the ultimate pain would be losing you, and you're worth dying for. I can't keep my mind off you I try to write poems, but all thoughts travel back to your face. I try to have normal conversations but a

Your nothing is my everything by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

Your nothing is my everything

The hugs you give me keep my heart beating. Your tiny tears are my worste fears. Your normal goodbyes are my heart's painful cries Your "I love you's" thrown out carelessly i keep in my heart for my cherishing. It's no suprise that your smallest actions are enormous in my eyes

I'm tired of the normal by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

I'm tired of the normal

shit gets old as my heart turns cold and im left again by myself. its ok because im used to it this way the everday cycle from hell. it starts off as excitement your phone call makes me smile. but excitement slowly turns into dissappointment as you talk about her and i pretend to care for a while. dissappointment rockets into happiness As the phone whispers your "i love you" in my ear. but my happiness plumets into saddness because i realize that the sentence is not sincere. saddness to anxiousness as i hear the normal "can i call you back later". as i wait with my phone the time goes by so slow which is the real frustraito

The Garden of Dreams by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

The Garden of Dreams

The sun rises in the back of my mind and a garden full of blooming flowers appear. The soft wind brushes my hair away from my face and all that remains is a single tear. The clouds suddenly lighten as darkness disappears The storm is finally over and the rain has stopped as soft dew drops remain at each of the flower petals' very top. The birds come out and sing their song as the sun begins to shine. As i look around at the gentle scene your bright eyes flash at mine. That smile, you give it to me as you walk over the bridge on the stream. i fling my arms around your neck, embracingly As You Kiss me... The picture perfect sc

Is this the Last Goodbye? by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

Is this the Last Goodbye?

i was forced to say goodbye. and after all i had tried you still left me... as i wipe the last tear from my lonley eye i fear i will never see you again. i know i wont but with the normal "call me later" i hold in all my feelings of saddening anger i watch you slowly fade out of sight as i think to myself, "its ok, i'LL talk to her tonight" the normal deep stare and then you're eyes figure vanishes into thin air Later that night Darkness covers the sky as i sit with my phone in my lap and wonder why you still havent called. Was it my fault? Did i not try hard enough? Just my Luck, As Soon as i start to fall in love ii`m

My Pain To Choose by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

My Pain To Choose

My own personal anguish The torment i put myself through I don't understand why except its All Because Of You. The pain everday of seeing you walk my way Knowing that i can't have you it k.i.L.L.s. me slowly i turn my face to hide the look of pain i've come to know so well. I do this all to myself... Look me deep in the eyes like you always do and realize That I'm in love with you. Please dont lead me on because that hurts even worse. I'm swallowing tears and supressing sighs and gentle cries for you... So please don't deny me for long because im s.l.o.w.l.y. going insane ...everyone is going to hurt you sooner or late

Best Friends Forever by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

Best Friends Forever

Little uniforms, recess time Hop scotch, jump rope, and nursery rhymes Growin up with you since the age of 6 kindergarten naptime and pick-up-sticks We Been tight from the very start Not Even Boys were able to keep us apart. Many Dumb arguements and Fights But also Great laughs and late LATE nights. Pictures from the beach, which ill never forget, placed on a shelf Always to be remembered, especially since you peed on yourself. From Gangster, to skater, to prep until finding who we really were I didnt care who it was, but just being Heaby and Shawa is what i prefer. Laughing at the stupidest things is what we did best Making one

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frustration by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

frustration

frustration is the endless thought running through my brain its that annoying sound like the drops falling outside form the rain. the contant pounding away inside my head raking my brain without end. what do i do, what are my options, i dont understand anything except i lost him. i dont think i can get him back ever again no matter how hard i try, i gave my best attempt and all i get is another hurtful goodbye. he doesnt mean to hurt me and i know he never would but he doesnt know damage hes done, hes never understood the effect he had on me since the day i met him and sicne then it was like heaven when i got to spend time with him

he once was mine by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

he once was mine

i want him back but i dont wana mess anythin up hes got it good and i dont wana be the one to make him slip up i learned my lesson with messin with another girls man but its not fair when i was the one who first had his hand. when im with him its so different now its like i act different but i dont know how. im so much more comfortable than before im trying to put my mind to productive things. please tell me the honest truth. it doesnt take me long to write these things because i have so many thoughts and feelings going through my head. give me an honest opinion but now that i am i dont have the chance to prove it anymore. he acts li

Lost Love by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

Lost Love

i never wana say im pressed but i am and i know better. but i cant do anything cuz she took you away from me and i sat there and just let her. why didnt i fight for you i acted like it didnt phase me now that i fall deeper and deeper nothing is there to save me. Its all different now when im with you all you have to do is look at me suddenly everything disappears and my heart tells the truth, its racing. the truth is i miss you so much it hurts i can still honestly say im still in love i wish that i was her, and i'd do anything to be with you again when push comes to shove. sitting here and thinking back at all of the shared

Thas Some Shit by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

Thas Some Shit

Thas some shit how i was so pressed you had me lookin a mess Thas some shit you said it was my fault and i was the one th at caused it Thas some shit how you had me stressin because you said i was tha one messin up thas some shit how you left me for my friend n you say ur guna be with her instead thas some shit how i wana slap you but at tha same time i cant be mad at you thas some shit how i would do it all again if i could cuz if theres anythin i could do to be with you i would ....

Eyes never lie by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

Eyes never lie

Trying to hold back all the emotions of wanting to laugh and having to cry but My Eyes Never Lie You look at me and my knees get weaker but then you look at her so much more tenderly, so much deeper and Your Eyes Never Lie She gives you everything you need and want i try, but you look at me then her and Your Eyes Never Lie If i question my feelings for you all i have to do is look at you and you give me reassurance. Your Eyes Never Lie If you ever want to know if I still care or love youl, look at me closer, look inside because My Eyes Will Never Lie.

Lie by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

Lie

She restricts you and limits you from your freinds. she tells you that you cant talk to me you come and chill with my anyways. i promise not to try anything. Its hard to keep that promise when i want to be with you so bad i know i cant do anything my chance is gone. my time already been had. ive been in this positiion before you lie to her so she wont know all we did was chill, we didnt even miss but still im being called a stupid hoe. people callin and disrespectin me and my moms that shit doesnt fly but since you wana be a dumbass and not admit you were w/ me you sit there and tell a big F'in lie. Why do i go through all of

Bein Me by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

Bein Me

Im tired of people saying im trying to be someone im not. Because i dont have to, I have somethin they dont got. I'm just tryin to be me which is better than anythin You'll ever be. You may not see whats inside of me , but im different than anyone else. i have confidence in myself. We put people on a shelf trying to display some ideal person to portray but we dont realize the person to idolize is the one and only You

The Dream by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

The Dream

Its amazing how after all this time i still melt when i look at you. you take me by the hand and look me in the eyes. All my fears die. Troubles, worries, cares have vanished into air But then i wake up and again life's not fair. I am forced to live in the shadow of another girl. One chosen in place of me. I got dropped quickly, to you it may seem But to me it was an eternity. I still linger in that dream that went by so fast. But time has past and all i can do is reminisce on what we were. I still find myself comparing me to her, trying to find out what went wrong. But then i drift back into my dream with the love song

Feelings by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

Feelings

Im getting so mixed up in everything thats going on. Im getting into trouble and I cant seem to tell right from wrong. I got friends ditching me My school work is always late My mom keeps gettin' on me And the only feeling *That Guy* has for me is hate. My best friend is turning into a hoe. My moms telling me to be ready because my grandma might die soon and All i can say is "I know". So dont say you're going to be there for me unless you really will be. Because if you dont and the time comes when you need me, I just might be busy. Don't ask what I'm feeling if you really dont wana know. Because you might get more than y

I owe you Everything by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

I owe you Everything

Times are getting harder And happy moments are short but whenever I need someone, I know your there to give me support. From stupid stuff like what i should wear to my never ending guy trouble I know you'll always be there to help me through the stuggle. You gave me the love and advice i needed to get me through those rough days. How do I even begin to thank you? How do i repay? I want you to know that no matter what i always got your back. We are all ways together and we fit so well, you pick up where i always lack. You can trust me with your secrets, your life. I'll give you my all. Never worry about whos there to catch y

Watchers 11

Monique17

XurakasX

Pensinpotatoes

rebel-moon

Drumboy

denomanator

Vampriss17

sparklingrain

can-you-see-me

yankeechic2290

tigress86

Watching 13

Pensinpotatoes

kittynn

dimples28

blaqbuttafly

fallen-princess

AellaWind

Vampriss17

Visionoflegacy

sparklingrain

can-you-see-me

yankeechic2290

Sylence86

tigress86

Collection

Favourites

Unnoticed by sparklingrain, literature

Literature

Unnoticed

Here I am, by your side Yet completely unnoticed by you I've felt the tears you cry Yet you don't notice when I do. I've been here for you all the time Holding your hand, encouraging you Why do you have to do this? It's a crime Because I've been here true and true. What do I have to do to get your attention? Why do I even have to compete? I've been there no matter what for you, Yet all I get is your rejection. Shoved off for someone else Every time I try to care, I get pushed away. I'm sick of it, do you hear me? I can't take much more... Either you love me or you don't Your fickleness I can no longer ignore.

Shredded by sparklingrain, literature

Literature

Shredded

My heart ripped open My eyes swollen from tears Shivering in a corner Confirmed in my fears. You love her, you said it yourself I can't stand this pain I have to go All my efforts have been in vain. Don't say it...I already know Yes...I'm talking to you...you know who you are I used to be so close to you...why do I feel so far? Leave me alone, I've had enough of your lies Leave me to my shredded heart...alone in my demise.

HeartbrokenBeaches by yankeechic2290, literature

Literature

HeartbrokenBeaches

As I lay here the sun about to set I see everything more clear nocturnal is what I've become as I look down I wish to grasp the sand below but it only slips away it is then I realize that this is where the lonely at heart live they stay here with the loves that they once lost slipped right through the cracks of their delicate fingers as the sand does through mine and it is then that my mind wanders back to you Do you ever come here, to this place? many of us wander here we'd love for you to keep us company we'll be sitting here awaiting your return you brought each and everyone of us to our demise but your so thoughtful t

IDontWantToBeAloneTonight by yankeechic2290, literature

Literature

IDontWantToBeAloneTonight

the stars are shining so bright tonight meet me half way at our favorite spot show me all the right spots do that cute thing you do that makes my heart race look me in the eyes, smile, and sigh you could kill me if you wanted too I know you were sitting there trying to concentrate on what that overly enthusiastic teacher was attempting to say but I could feel the tention I was trying to cut right through it just to find a hole to stare into your beautiful brown eyes I know you feel like I do My instincts have never failed me before so hold me in your arms and tell me how you feel I don't care if its not right and I don't care

Perfect by Vampriss17, literature

Literature

Perfect

There is only one word to describe you. I have secretly loved you for so long. I finally worked up the courage to tell you, but when I did, it just felt so wrong. I told my deepest, darkest secret to the person it was about, but I can't tell another soul, I have to make sure not to blurt it out. I am writing this to tell you, I love you dear and true, and the only person I want to it from, is the person that I am sending this to. I think about you day and night, from the moment I wake up. And I cry myself to sleep at night, knowing nothing would ever happen between us. I know you are in love with her, and I am very happy for y

Whats the Worst thing I could, by yankeechic2290, literature

Literature

Whats the Worst thing I could,

Standing here looking at you there Wondering how to approch you You see me stareing, smile and wave comming over, my body stiffens because Im so afraid of what I might do You just dont understand what its like When your around I cant control myself My speech, my actions.. im usless to control my actions when it comes to you Watching you walk over here seems like slow motion which in some way is good because it gives me sometime to somehow think of something to say I mean common, what's the worst thing I could say I cant stop thinking about you I love you so much that it hurts when your not around I can't stand it when I'm not

The Collision of Your Kiss by yankeechic2290, literature

Literature

The Collision of Your Kiss

Memories beautiful things memories of your laughter ringing in your ears Times that put the love back in my heart times we were so messed up we could hardly laugh times we felt like dieing, at death's door you always wanted more sitting on the couch, stareing into my eyes telling me how much she meant to you how you'd give anything to feel her touch but at the same time you just wish you could leave get out, far away from here back to the beginning where life looked so easy but she's what keeps you going get's you up in the morning makes you a better person its times like these that I wish I were invisible Like glass see t

Forever is my Favorite Word by yankeechic2290, literature

Literature

Forever is my Favorite Word

Forever Great word huh? when ever I think of it I think of you I know that were not together But Im hopeing that our friendship will live forever I know that eventually people move on and some people dont even believe in love all it is is lust thats what they say but I dont believe them I think there really is that one special person that one person you find only once that when you find them you never forget them you'll always love them I dont know if im right but I do feel that my love for you is right and I do know that No matter what happens in the future this very moment and all the other moments that I have had wh

About A Girl by xFallBehindMe, literature

Literature

About A Girl

She walked with strings and flew through the air she stepped on cracks with out a care she cried in the rain so no one could see her pain tears rolling down her pale cheeks someone to love her is what she seeks someone who needs her like she needs him becuase she feels all alone The walls are caving in She sits on an abandoned plain. they've locked her in and thrown away the key she's done enough crying shed enough tears to fill the sea. Her heart feels like its dying love is needed to keep it alive for who she is is not who they want her to be the box surrounds her and the lid closes.

Deviation Spotlight

Message in a Bottle by Bonafiiedx, literature

Literature

Message in a Bottle

A lonely girl walks the sands Drags her feet along the water Thinking about what had just happened And the lesson it had taught her. Relating her problems to something real something tangible She reaches down and grabs some sand and realized her pain is unmanageable. Love washed gently at her feet such as the ocean foam does Then taken away so suddenly retracting all the kisses shared, memories, and love. Everything she had, washed out with the tide left with nothing but faint footprints in the sand a single tear drips from her make-up smudged eye. Looking down she sees a bottle covered in seaweed and dirt Pulling off the ro

Message in a Bottle

About Bonafiiedx

Artist // Literature

United States
Deviant for 19 years
She / Her

Badges

My Bio

Current Residence: that 703 area
Favourite genre of music: Hip Hop/ R&B
Favourite cartoon character: Tigger/ Scooby Doo/ Blues Clues
Personal Quote: Why love life from dream to dream, and dred the day when dreaming ends...*

Favourite Movies

love and basketball/ "O"/ Moulin Rouge

Favourite Bands / Musical Artists

Alicia Keys, Ashlee Simpson, Christina Aguilera

Other Interests

friends, shopping, n that 1 special kid :)

Posts

Aug 10, 2005

the unanswered question

0 min read

how come when you want something SO bad for SO long that when you get it, it doesnt seem real.  Like its too good to be true.  And then you worry about losing it the whole time you have it? I wish i knew... o well... i guess you just have to enjoy it while its there!!!

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Jun 27, 2005

ToO MuCh!

0 min read

Well, its deffinately been a busy time.  My cousin, one of my closest friends, and some other friends graduated highschool! Yeh `05... damn i got a long way til `08.  I got my learners, been driving for about a week (im very good might i say) and i died my hair a red-brown.  My best friend at my school left me.  I know that the last day of school was the last time i'm guna see her for a while and i miss her SO much already.  i dont know wat im guna do without her next year.  its crazy and its makin me crazy too.  Its amazing how fast things can change.  I hate change.  Summer is here, and for the first time in a long time i wish it wasn't.  i

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May 24, 2005

Devious Journal Entry

0 min read

Main Entry: bo·na fide Pronunciation: 'bO-n&-"fId Function: adjective Etymology: Latin, in good faith 1 a : characterized by good faith and lack of fraud or deceit  b : valid under or in compliance with the law 2 : made with or characterized by sincerity 3 : being real or genuine When Times Get Hard, I Just Gota Be Me.

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Profile Comments 74

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Jul 6, 2005

you been gone too long

Jul 20, 2005

no really. this vacation is taking too long. COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOME BACK!

Jun 24, 2005

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TAG UR IT! THIS IS A SEXYY TRAIN IF U RECIEVE THIS IT MEANS
UR FREAKIN SEXY.... IF U GET THIS BACK UR EVEN
SEXIERR...SEND THIS TO 10 PEOPLE....IF U BREAK THIS CHAIN U
WILL HAVE BAD SEX FOR THE NEXT 30 YEARS.....GOODLUCK

blaqbuttafly

Jun 15, 2005

wanna go to dupont circle with me and que this weekend, she said it be fun but i dont wanna go only wit her, she gonna dip out on me on the first sight of a pretty female...i need someone to kick it wit up there-. i do NOT wanna get booked. there is some nice shops there

Jun 5, 2005

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

jus showing sum love

papertigress

May 18, 2005

Thank you soooo much for faving I smell SEX and CANDY [link]